A-/B+ The Existent Grade For The Non-Existent Number

From the midst of vague letter grading, a new grade has somehow been born: the ‘A-/B+.’ When I first laid my on upon this grade, I immediately asked myself “What does this mean?”

The grading scheme I was taught was that ‘A-‘ is a 90-92.99... and a “B+’ was a 87-89.99... Thus, where does this grade lie? Super sleuth (i.e. me) was on the case, so I went and asked the teacher what number this referred. “Well that settles it,” you might say, “you must have gotten an answer.” Well I’m afraid you are mistaken.

The only thing the teacher said was that it was a grade in-between the two grades, which is not possible. Unless, somehow, teachers have managed to discover a number that exists in nothingness. A number that that somehow bridges the gap between the gapless and separates the inseparable. Somehow, these teachers have changed the very nature of logic and math bringing into being a true contradiction. This number will revolutionize the very fabric of math and science!

Then again, it could just be a way for teachers to remain indecisive over grades, but the first option is much cooler.

Thus, when you get an ‘A-/B+’ or something equivalent, don’t be discouraged or confused. Be proud that you have been given the chance to experience perhaps the greatest mathematical discovery since roman numerals.

-The Anon Blogger

P.S. If your friend is discouraged or confused over an ‘A-/B+,’ just send them this post and remind them how great an honor this grade truly is.

Featured: This week's featured person is a blogger! Dan Bonser, who writes A Brainless Nod wrote a comment on my last post, so I decided it is his turn for Anon Blog featured glory! Here's his blog link, so go check him out: http://abrainlessnod.blogspot.com/2012/09/to-have-schedule.html

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Congratulations, You Won: Stop The Talking Advertisements!!!

Advertisements. I’ve already talked about the ads that say you are the 1,000,000th visitor here, but other advertisements have been swarming the Internet causing havoc throughout the world. These are talking advertisements.

You know, those annoying ads that start speaking whenever you visit some of your favorite sites. Sometimes they can be funny and sometimes they can be just plain annoying (as opposed to the other types of annoying).

Take the following scene from my math class:

Teacher: Blah Blah Blah…Calculus…Blah Blah Blah…Fractions…

Kid’s computer: CONGRATULATIONS YOU WON!!!

Class: HAHAHAHAHAHA

Kid with computer: (Face Red)

Now I am not saying that this was not funny, (for what is more funny than laughing at a fellow man’s embarrassment #wearesuchgoodpeople), but the question is why is it necessary? Would this type of advertising happen in real life?

Well let’s imagine…Close your eyes and- Well actually do not close your eyes or else you won’t be able to read. Keep your eyes open and envision the following…

You are walking down the street, looking at stores and attractions when all of a sudden a huge sign comes, blocks your way to where you want to go and screams, “CONGRATULATIONS YOU WON!!!!”

Personally, I do not think that would be very fun. Thus, rather than letting the machines take over and tell us what we’ve won, I say we fight against the speaking advertisements, not just for ourselves but for humankind.

Either that or we could shut off our computer volume, but that just seems like too much work.

-The Anon Blogger

Featured: This weeks featured person is a blogger! He is the writer of the Nothing Profound blog and has support this blog a lot including a comment on my last post. Here is his blog link: http://wwwaphorismscom.blogspot.com/ Make sure to check him out!

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Procrastination: The Secret to Success?

What is the secret to success?

The cliché answer to this is "do not procrastinate!"

I love Clichés, but this one is not always true. I present to the arguments for procrastination:

1. With procrastinating time goes by, including time to discuss the project with others and time to reflect on it. By the time you are writing it last minute, you have maximized the amount of knowledge you could have before writing. Benefit? I think so.

2. When you start things early, there is not much motivation driving you. There isn’t any pressure saying “I have to do this now.” With procrastination, you are always thinking, “I have to do this now or fail.” Plenty of pressure means more motivation. More motivation=More passion=Better writing (maybe).

3. By that same train of thought, more pressure means more focus. You know you need to finish this project now, so there is no time for breaks or distractions. This means your mind will be completely focused on work.

4. Procrastination also means you will be going to sleep later, which means you will be more tired. Thus, unlike early nights where you might have trouble falling to sleep, with procrastination, you’ll fall asleep immediately. You might even fall asleep before you make it to bed.

As you can see, procrastination has many benefits. It can lead to better writing and better sleep. The only possible downsides are that rushing will lead to terrible writing, or you won’t be able to finish it in time, both leading to failure. Other than that, procrastination is clearly the best strategy around.

-The Ano...eh I'll finish the signature later.

Featured: This weeks featured person is an Actress, Lainey Lipson. Currently she plays Scene on the popular Youtube webseries, MyMusic. She also has her own singing channel:  http://www.youtube.com/user/laineylips. She is an amazing singer and a great actress. If you've seen MyMusic, you know what I'm talking about. Also, she is a very dedicated tweeter, responding to it almost 24/7. Here's her twitter link: https://twitter.com/LaineyLips. Hopefully you'll check her stuff out! (Also Lainey if you're reading this, comment below to tell me what you think and share to spread the word!)

If you want to get featured below, leave a comment below, tweet @ me, or comment/message me on Facebook.

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The Professor and The Elevator Triangle

Imagine yourself talking with a friend on the way home to your apartment. You click the elevator button and it comes. You walk in and someone comes in with you. What happens? The elevator becomes silent. Then as you reach your floor and leave the elevator, the conversation continues.

This, dear readers, is what I call The Elevator Triangle. A place where all conversations seem to disappear. Today, I will be outline it's key features.

There are many additional aspects that come with The Elevator Triangle theory, like The Postulate of Button Awkwardness. For example, you walk into the elevator with another person: Do you offer to push their floor button for them? Do you wait for them to ask you for yours? Or do you just push your own button? If you press their button for them, and they reach for it too, your hands might bang into each other. If you wait, you might never get to your floor, and if you press only your own button, the other person might think you are being rude. Anyway you do it leads to Button Awkwardness [Insert Sad Face Here].

Another example of the Postulate of Button Awkwardness is excessive button pushing. This is when somebody is either waiting to get into the elevator or to get out, so he/she/it presses his/her/it's button over and over and over and over...(I think you get the pattern). And in the end, for some strange reason, the elevator does not move any faster. Science is strange sometimes.

Another piece of The Elevator Triangle, is the Door Holding Delay Principle (try saying that 5 times fast (it's actually quite easy now that I think about it...)). You are in the elevator and see someone coming into the building. Do you hold the door for them or do you click the door close button? If you hold the door, you will be delayed, and they might not even need to use the elevator, and if you close the door, they might see it as rude and you are delaying them. Either way, you get Door Holding Delay.

So, dear readers, these are the properties, postulates, and principles of The Elevator Triangle. I hope now when you go into an elevator, you now can realize it's effect.

Til the next lesson,

-The Anonymous Professor

P.S. I hope you enjoyed this new type of post called "The Professor and..." If you enjoyed it, click the like button below, and if there is enough positive feedback, I will make it a regular segment.

Featured: This week's featured user is not a blogger. It's a Youtuber! Well actually two Youtuber's, TheFu! They are semi-famous for their appearance on YOMYOMF's Internet Icon and are hoping to make their youtube music carrer a full time job, so help them accomplish their goal by watching  their videos and subscribing! Here's their channel: http://www.youtube.com/user/thefumusic?feature=CAgQwRs%3D

P.P.S If TheFu are reading this post, tell me what you think below! (And share it if you can #shamelessselfpromotion)

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