Thursday, August 16, 2012

I'm Getting Old in 3D

There comes a time in every man's and woman's life that he/she gets old. The way to test if you’re old is to think of all the modern inventions in the world: if you like them or are neutral to them, then congrats, you still have your youth. If not, congrats, you can now collect social security.

Nowadays, you see this test working everywhere. Some people complain about that dang flabbit Rock Music or Hip-Hop. Some complain about that internet thing and "The Youtube." Some even complain about color TV, but me, I complain about 3D (That sentence rhymed).

Every movie that comes out is in 3D, and now game consoles and TVs are converting to it. I have watched many 3D movies, but every time the 3D hurts my eyes, giving me a headache, and when I try to reach out to touch the images, I end up hitting myself in the face. (Even writing 3D on the computer is hard: half the time I accidentally hold down the shift button when pressing the 3 and get #D or I don't and get 3d, which looks terrible. Go ahead try writing 3D 10 times fast on your computer. It's really hard. I'll wait................ ..........................................................................................................................Do you see what I mean?)

Anyway, with this revelation, I have transgressed into the threshold of oldness, but don't worry about me, young whippersnappers, I always look at the bright side. Free bingo night here I come.

BONUS CONTENT: To experience the movies yourself in a choose your own adventure, click THIS LINK

-The Anonymous Senior Citizen Blogger

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Monday, August 13, 2012

The English Rebellion Awesome Announcement

On Thursday, the rebellion began. We all vowed to rid ourselves of the English language’s silent letters. I decided that we needed something to make it official, so I searched the depths of the Internet, and I found a petition site that you, dear readers, can join to join the rebellion!


Sign your name, spread it to everyone you know, and join the rebellion! Do it for yourself, NAY your country, NAY do it for the world.

If you want updates on the rebellion, like The Anon Bloggers on Facebook HERE.

Together, we can make the English language the way it was meant to be.

-The Anon Rebel

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Thursday, August 9, 2012

An English Rebellion: Silent Letters

For many years, the English language has been filled with confusing words and sentences. It is ridden with words with thousands of meanings and meanings with thousands of words. In these segments, I aim at rooting out the issues with language and starting: An English Rebellion

One of the most confusing things about the language is silent letters. Let’s face it. When we come to words we don’t recognize, we can never sound all of them out because who Knows where the silent letter is. This can lead to embarrassment, shame, and confusion for anyone who reads.

“What is my suggestion,” you ask. Well I am glad you asked that…

I say, instead of hiding and pretending these letters don’t exist we embrace them. Pronounce every letter in the world like the sounds we were taught in school. Pronounce the ‘K’ in ‘Know,’ pronounce the ‘P’ in ‘Pneumonia,’ and pronounce the ‘C’ in scissors. When someone says ‘nomes,’ don't pretend it's right. Say, “What’s that? I believe you mean ‘Gnomes.’ You forgot the ‘G.’” No longer are we shackled by the confines of standard speech. We can say the words the way they were meant to be said.

Imagine a world without any silent letters. A world where there is no word you don’t Know. No Surprises awaiting you. That is a world that I dream of.

Silent letters cause confusion all around the world, and with us, we can end that confusion. So dear readers, join with me as we take a stand against the silent letters that have plagued the world for so long. Together we can save the English language.

(To help with the rebellion and do this weeks bonus content, go: HERE)

(To sign the list of rebels, go: HERE)

-The Anon Blogger

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Monday, August 6, 2012

Life is Not a Pleasure Trip (Guest Post)

Beautiful bathroom, but where’s the soap?
Hey all, 
This is the first in what I hope to be a series of guest posts from other bloggers around the web who want to contribute to the blog. This one is from Marilyn Baron with slight edits by me. Her bio is below. Tell me what you think :)

“Does everything in life have to be fun?” That was one of my father’s favorite expressions, right after his pronouncement, “Life is not a pleasure trip.” And my answer to that question was always, “Yes.” Life isn’t always fun, but a lot of things we experience every day are funny.
Like yesterday, when the woman in the grocery store deli handed me my sliced cheese order, followed by a cheery, “Come back to see us.” Of course I’m going to come back to see her—if I want to eat. No wait, I think I’ll skip going to the grocery store for a few weeks and see how long it takes me to starve. I know she was just trying to be nice and of course I know there are other grocery stores in my neighborhood, so they’re just trying to keep my business, but some things just strike me as humorous. When they do, I write them down and try to find a way to incorporate them into my stories.

Like the other morning when I asked my husband to hand me a plate while he was making his breakfast, and he said: “You can’t multitask when you’re making oatmeal.” The proof of which is splattered all over the inside of my microwave at least two or three times a week.

Last Call to Missoula

Earlier this week, we were at McCarran Airport in Las Vegas waiting to fly back to Atlanta when the airline representative announced over the PA system, “Last call to Missoula.”
“Where’s Missoula?” I asked my husband.
“I think it’s in Montana,” he answered.
After the third or fourth “last call,” my husband said, “They must still be trying to scare up some passengers, as in “Are you sure no one wants to go to Missoula? The doors are closing.”
Then the fun began on our flight home. I was getting settled when a giant of a man who looked like a hefty linebacker (think Refrigerator Perry) sat next to me and his biceps literally spilled over into my seat as the mass of humanity poured through the aisle.
Then one of the flight attendants announced, “This is going to be a full flight.”
“Surprise.” When is any flight these days ever NOT a full flight?
Are we having fun yet?
No, because a woman behind me was shuffling a deck of cards over and over. She wasn’t playing cards or dealing cards, just shuffling, VERY LOUDLY. “The Shuffler”
continued to shuffle the cards throughout the entire 3 ½-hour flight. At least there were no screaming babies.

The Great Soap Conspiracy

I’ve been traveling a lot this summer and I think I’ve detected what I call The Great Soap Conspiracy. Is there a global shortage of soap I don’t know about? I understand the need to conserve water, but soap?

It started on my trip to Spain. My sister and I stayed in 5-star hotels. They provided one bar of soap between us and we had to use the same bar in the sink as we did in the shower. After two days of not replacing the soap, I called the front desk and asked for more soap.

When my husband and I went to Aspen over the summer I noticed the same phenomenon at another first-class hotel. One bar of soap that was never replaced. Chintzy.

In Las Vegas, however, our hotel actually provided a bar of soap for the bath and one for the sink. I guess you have to throw the soap away in order for them to replace it. Or I’ll have to bring my own soap next time I go out of town. I don’t find that very funny.

I try to inject humor into every story I write, from romantic suspense and paranormal to women’s fiction. My favorite books to read are humorous. I like to laugh and I think my readers do too.
Leaving readers laughing is not always easy to do because many of my stories have serious themes. However, every one of them has a humorous element and a heartwarming, surprise ending. For example, “A Choir of Angels,”  starts out with a fatal house explosion on the eve of a young girl’s wedding. Nothing funny about that, but the story is written in a humorous tone. In “Follow an Angel,” the themes of loneliness and rejection are balanced by humor when an angel on a mission drops into a 5th floor Florida beach condo to help the heroine find her soul mate on Twitter. “The Stand-in Bridegroom,” opens with a missing bridegroom. Each story involves a death and an angel, and yet all have happy endings.

When I read, I like to be entertained. Reading relaxes me. I don’t like books where I have to slog through obscure literary references and decipher hidden meanings. If a book makes me laugh or smile, so much the better. So if you’re a writer, keep a notebook handy and write down things you find funny. If you’re a reader, sit back and enjoy the read because when you read, life really is a pleasure trip.

Bio:

Georgia Author Marilyn Baron, a public relations consultant in Atlanta, writes humorous women’s fiction, humorous paranormal short stories and romantic suspense. Her latest release, Dead Mix, is available from TWB Press at http://www.twbpress.com/deadmix.html; Amazon http://www.amazon.com/Dead-Mix-ebook/dp/B008P4LFI4/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1344028502&sr=1-1&keywords=Dead+Mix; and Barnes & Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/dead-mix-marilyn-baron/1112257979?ean=2940014991049. To read more about her women’s fiction, “The Edger,” visit her blog at Petit Fours and Hot Tamales at http://www.petitfoursandhottamales.com/marilyn-baron/; Find her angel stories, “A Choir of Angels,” “Follow an Angel,” and “The Stand-in Bridegroom, “ at TWB Press: http://www.twbpress.com/achoirofangels.html. Find her on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Marilyn-Baron/286807714666748 and Twitter at https://twitter.com/MarilynBaron. Her next book, “Under the Moon Gate,” a romantic thriller set in contemporary and WW II Bermuda, will be released from The Wild Rose Press in spring 2013. Marilyn is a member of Romance Writers of America, Georgia Romance Writers and Marketing For Romance Writers. She is a finalist in the Georgia Romance Writers 2012 Unpublished Maggie Award of Excellence in the Paranormal/Fantasy Romance category for “Sixth Sense.”

Hope you enjoyed the first guest post! Tell me what you think in the comments below, and if you want to write your own guest post, send a message to my Facebook page (link below). New post Thursday that I'm excited for, so see you soon.

-The Anon Blogger




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Thursday, August 2, 2012

Comic: Timmy The Spider #1

Congratulations, dear reader, you are reading the first Timmy The Spider comic!!!

Timmy is a Spider, who gets into a bunch of wacky situations. Check it out!





So that was the first of what I hope to be a monthly series at least. 'Like' us on Facebook (like box on the sidebar), and vote on the poll and tell me if you want to hear more from Timmy The Spider. Also, make sure to comment below to tell me what you think!

Link to Poll: HERE

To see the other Timmy The Spider comics click the links below:

-The Anon Blogger

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